{"id":330323,"date":"2025-12-12T10:14:18","date_gmt":"2025-12-12T08:14:18","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.monaco-tribune.com\/2025\/12\/what-if-the-real-luxury-was-knowing-how-to-say-no-the-art-of-setting-boundaries\/"},"modified":"2025-12-13T08:46:05","modified_gmt":"2025-12-13T06:46:05","slug":"what-if-the-real-luxury-was-knowing-how-to-say-no-the-art-of-setting-boundaries","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.monaco-tribune.com\/en\/2025\/12\/what-if-the-real-luxury-was-knowing-how-to-say-no-the-art-of-setting-boundaries\/","title":{"rendered":"What if the real luxury was knowing how to say no? The art of setting boundaries"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Saying no is not a refusal: it is a position. In this column, Laurence Shukor, transition coach, analyses why learning to set boundaries has become central to our inner balance.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n

The paradox of always saying yes<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n

In our fast-paced modern lives, where \u201cbeing available\u201d is often considered a professional quality, saying no seems almost inappropriate. As Greg McKeown, author of Essentialism, writes: “If you don’t prioritise your life, someone else will do it for you. “<\/p>\n\n

Yet we spend our days saying yes: yes out of habit, yes to avoid disappointing others, yes to keep up with the pace, yes to avoid disturbing others.<\/p>\n\n

But by saying yes to everything, we end up forgetting ourselves.<\/p>\n\n

Saying no is an act of lucidity. It is recognizing that our time, attention, and energy are not unlimited, and that they deserve to be protected.<\/p>\n

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Saying no doesn’t mean closing one door; it means opening another one for yourself \/ Photo via Unsplash<\/em><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n

Saying no is not refusing: it is choosing<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n

A sensible no is never a rejection. It is a choice, a direction, a clear gesture towards what really matters. <\/p>\n\n

Psychiatrist Christophe Andr\u00e9 reminds us that \u201cbeing kind to yourself is an act of resistance.\u201d Saying no is part of that, it is refusing to be scattered, exhausted, or erased.<\/p>\n\n

I am still working on learning this myself. My drivers, \u201cbe perfect\u201d and \u201cplease others,\u201d are tough to overcome. They have guided my life, sometimes effectively, sometimes to the detriment of my own needs. Learning to say no has also been an act of reconciliation with my inner priorities.<\/p>\n\n

Saying no is not closing a door, it is opening another one, for yourself.<\/p>\n\n

The five drivers: invisible injunctions that prevent us from saying no<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n

Transactional Analysis describes five drivers, messages internalised in childhood that unconsciously guide our behaviour:<\/p>\n\n